Kids Are Handing Out Business Cards for Playdates Now? We Have Thoughts
Is this cute, or concerning?Fact checked by Sarah ScottFact checked by Sarah ScottThroughout my son’s kindergarten year, he would often come home requesting to have a playdate with one particular friend in his class. Unfortunately, his teacher was resistant to creating a contact list, and I never really got the chance to connect with the other child's mom–so our kids didn't play together outside of school. This year, he’s in a new class with new friends–and luckily, I know the parent of the boy he enjoys playing with well enough to arrange playdates.But when I saw a story about children passing out their own, personalized playdate business cards, I wondered if this idea could have helped us out in the past. I also had some concerns.
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Have My People Call Your People?Playdate business cards are essentially more vibrant, playful-looking versions of adult business cards, printed with a child’s name—and sometimes their picture—along with their parents’ contact information, as well as a fun tagline such as, “Want to play? Have your people call my people.”You can see examples of playdate business cards for sale on Etsy.Parents, if your kiddo came home with a play date “business” card from a classmate would it be weird? 😂 I want to send some in to Pennys classmates since she asks for playdates all the time and I don’t know their numbers. pic.twitter.com/WilofHqCrg— lex (@elderemo_mama) March 23, 2024
Many parents on social media are in love with the idea, with one mom on TikTok billing playdate business cards as the perfect solution for introverted parents of extroverted kids. In other words, if you struggle to approach other parents to propose a playdate, you can allow your child to hand out cards in school or at the park. @_msvanity I had to shareeee ♬ original sound - Vanity Rodriguez Many commenters say the idea is “genius,” while others express safety concerns, especially since a card (containing personal info) in the hands of a small child is likely to get lost. Over on X (formerly Twitter), a user wondered if parents would find it “weird” if another child brought a playdate business card home.One mom jokes in response, writing, “I wouldn’t be weirded out, but I would think you have it way more together than me and maybe feel nervous to meet.”A lot of commenters shared they have actually printed up playdate business cards for their kids in the past, and they've helped make lasting connections. Not everyone had this experience, with one X user sharing, “I used to give parents at the park my business card if our kids played well together. My kid would struggle with the fact that she made a friend she’ll never see again. Not one mom ever reached out to me.”While so many commenters were big fans of the cards, a few admitted it’s not their cup of apple juice.“If I received this I would cringe even though I'm sure you put a lot of time into this. It feels extremely impersonal to me and I would get the sense you're more into how many playdates can I get my kid than having quality connections,” one parent responds. Another parent had a similar take, commenting, “Someone in my son’s preschool class does this, and I understand the sentiment behind it, but I do think it’s kind of weird. Maybe let’s go back to good old socializing at drop off or whatever and build a relationship that way and then get your kids together. That’s just me.”Someone else worried that if a child was handing out the cards at school, a peer who did not receive one would feel left out.With worries about safety and socialization being on my mind—and clearly on the minds of others—I turned to some experts to get their takes on playdate business cards.Are Playdate Business Cards a Good Idea?In an increasingly impersonal world, where communication happens largely online, Rachael Jones, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist based in Illinois, says she’s not a fan of the cards.“For children at an age when cell phones are not yet appropriate, playdate business cards feel like too much distance between parents and children in children's social lives,” she tells Parents. Jones expounds saying, “Parents are integral in children learning social skills, forming friendships, and differentiating between safe and unsafe people. To have kids make independent decisions can be complicated or messy at best and dangerous at worst.”Brook Choulet, MD, The Performance Psychiatrist, agrees: “Part of developing social skills in childhood is learning to navigate friendships. With cards, it removes some of the organic interactions that are important when forming connections.”But Gigi Schweikert, Parenting and Education Expert and CEO of Lightbridge Academy, has a different take on playdate business cards. Though, as a mom of four, she admits seeing playdates through to fruition is a challenge. “Many children make fast friends at their child care or preschool centers, but might not remember their new friend's name, making it difficult for parents to connect to schedule a playdate,” she observes.Add to that parents’ busy schedules–many of whom may require a different caregiver to handle school transport.“These playdate cards are a great way to connect children to socialization and connect parents who need the affirmation of one another and the opportunity to talk and hang out in a world that’s very rushed,” says Schweikert.Keep Safety Ahead of SocializationIf you decide to print up playdate business cards, it’s important to have safety as your top consideration, according to the experts we talked to.Jones says that if the cards fall into the wrong hands, it would be easy for someone with bad intentions to say something like, “Hey Scott. Your mom Stacey called me and asked me to pick you up. I even know her phone number!"A card with a picture of your child on it only makes it easier for a stranger to identify them.“If kids are giving out these cards in public places, like playgrounds, museums, and schools, it is possible for unintended recipients to get their hands on the cards,” seconds Dr. Choulet.She urges parents to use as little personal information as possible if they do print up playdate business cards. Examples might be leaving off last names and home addresses.Dr. Choulet assures parents, “These cards are not harmful in of themselves if used sparingly and in safe environments, while ensuring your child is getting adequate opportunities to develop their social skills.”She goes on to stress the importance of kids having the opportunity to develop in-person connections in a world where technological interaction is becoming predominant.Tips For Introverted Parents of Extroverted KidsIf, like me, you aren’t super outgoing, but you're also not into printing up playdate business cards, here are some tips:Use your existing crew: Connect with existing friends and neighbors with same-age kids to dip your toe in the playdate pool.Put a cap on it: Playdates don't need to be all-day events. An hour or two is enough for kids to practice sharing and socialization.Tap your kid's teacher: Ask your child’s teacher who your kid plays with most during the school day, and if they are willing to help make connections.Share your trepidation with your kids: You could say, "Mom gets really nervous about meeting new people, too. Maybe we can practice by going to talk to Joe's mom together.”Let structure do the work: Attend organized activities, like open gym or a music class where the inherent structures facilitate the development of natural connections without a heavy lift on parents.All things considered, I don’t think playdate business cards are for me. In addition to some of the obvious safety concerns, I’d much rather let my kid be a kid and not a salesman.Furthermore, as a bit of an introvert myself, I want to push myself to meet the parents of my kid's new friends. Not only would I be modeling good social skills, but I'd also be gathering more intel before agreeing to send my kid on a playdate.However, every family is different–and as Dr. Choulet says, “Parents have to do what works for them and their kids.” For more Parents news, make sure to sign up for our newsletter! Read the original article on Parents.
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