Grad season: Advice for the advice givers
Graduates get lots of advice this time of year, almost all of it well intended and some of it actually useful.
They also hear a lot of platitudes. They doze through commencement speeches and nod with appreciation at family and friends who honestly can’t imagine what it would be like to be 18 or 22 in the current political, economic and cultural environment.
The job market is tight. Churches are shrinking. College debt can seem insurmountable. Public rhetoric is ugly.
The pride beneath that cap and gown is real. So is the fear.
The number of U.S. high school graduates will peak this year at about 3.8 million before beginning a 15-year decline. College grads nationally total about 2 million.
So The Christian Chronicle Editorial Board considered what wisdom we might offer our fellow Christians who may be tempted to offer advice.
Hunter Wiederstein graduates from Oklahoma Christian University.
What should Christians do to encourage and support young men and women as they move into new roles in their families, churches and communities?
Generation Z has gotten enough advice for now. These suggestions are for the baby boomers, millennials and Gen Xers among us:
• Be welcoming and hospitable. One 30-something recalled “how much work and intention it takes to build a social life and community of friends after college … especially if you’re moving to a new city.” Find ways to introduce them to their new home, new church, new people. They will remember your kindness for the rest of their lives.
• Pray for them, without ceasing. Whether they begin a vocation or career at 18 or 22, they enter a world of uncertainty, where the job they thought they always wanted may not exist in five years. That’s scary. And it’s OK. Let them know that plans change. Jobs change. Life’s path is usually circuitous. Pray for their peace and assurance as they face the future.
“Be welcoming and hospitable. Pray for them, without ceasing. Allow them to study the Bible and develop their own faith. Be available and ask how you can help.”
• Allow them to study the Bible and develop their own faith based on what they read in God’s word, not what older Christians feel compelled to dictate. The ethics of artificial intelligence, the complexities of religion stained by politics, the biotech innovations that stretch the imagination — those dilemmas are largely new ones. Let them figure it out. Encourage, don’t demand. Point them to the Word of God. Don’t expect them to read it like you did.
• Be available and ask how you can help, but don’t assume the same solutions that worked for you will today. Ask what they need. Maybe they have a specific prayer request. Maybe they need to know where to get their car inspected. Maybe they need job advice or Sunday lunch. Ask. Don’t assume. Be present. Don’t push.
Be intentional about encouraging them. Allow mistakes. Help them see God at work along the way.
They need practical encouragement. They need patience, so model patience.
They don’t need Pollyanna. They need us.
And they need Jesus.
CHERYL MANN BACON is a Christian Chronicle contributing editor who served for 20 years as chair of the Department of Journalism and Mass Communication at Abilene Christian University. Contact [email protected].
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