His Ex And Her Boyfriend Wanted To Travel The Country In A Van And Take Their Children, But He Wouldn’t Let Them Go
A lot of people are finding the beauty of living in a van and traveling the country in nice RVs instead of staying in one state and in a house.
However, many people don’t choose to follow that lifestyle until they’re retired or their kids are all grown up, as trying to do it with younger kids can be very hard.
One man’s ex-wife wanted to take their kids with her and her boyfriend on their van trip across the country, but he said no, which put a strain on her relationship with their kids. Now, his ex is blaming him for their estrangement.
He has two kids with his ex-wife, Marcia, who is now married to a new man named Paul. He and Marcia began longing to lead different lifestyles, which is what led to their split.
Marcia is much more free-spirited and enjoys a more bohemian lifestyle, while he’s more traditional. They split custody of their two kids, who are now 14 and 12 years old.
“I never had a problem with Paul, [as] he’s a lot like Marcia and makes her happy,” he said.
“Plus, the kids seemed to like him. Marcia and I used to split custody 50/50, [but] a year ago, out of nowhere, Marcia told me that she and Paul wanted to travel the country in a renovated van. Paul is a huge fan of the van life culture on social media. She wanted me to give her permission to bring the kids and let them be homeschooled for a year. I could fly out to see the kids a few times, or she’d fly them back.”
He knew that Marcia and Paul weren’t well-equipped to give their kids a proper homeschool education, and even if they could, his kids didn’t want to go and didn’t want to leave their school. So, he said no.
Because he didn’t agree to let the kids go with Marcia and Paul for a year, the court granted him full custody while Marcia was on the road. The kids flew out to meet her and Paul in their van twice and hated it both times.
velirina – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
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“Marcia said they shouldn’t come again [and] I listened and validated my kids’ feelings, but never trash talked their mother,” he recalled.
“She and Paul returned in January [but] the kids heavily resent Marcia for leaving. I have them in therapy, but they don’t want to attend therapy with her.”
“Their therapist backs this up. Marcia tried to take me court [to get] our old agreement [back], but the judge said because she had no job, no stable housing [with] the van, and [she] barely saw her kids for a year, she can only have partial custody. The judge also says the kids are old enough to decide if they go [with her] or not. Most of the time, they don’t.”
This year, his kids refused to visit Marcia for Mother’s Day, and she called him up devastated. She told him that if he hadn’t said no to letting them travel with her in the van for that year, her relationship with them wouldn’t be so distant and sad.
“She said we could’ve talked them into it [and] I said she made her choice,“ he added.
“She decided living in a van and seeing the country was more interesting than seeing her kids for a year.”
“I pointed out she could’ve chosen to do it for the summer, and the kids may have agreed then. Even if they didn’t, they probably wouldn’t resent her. But no, she left for an entire year and broke their hearts.”
Should he feel bad for what happened to his kids and their mom, or has he done his best as a dad?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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