He’s Supposed To Be Getting Married This Summer, But He’s Thinking Of Ending His Engagement
Over the summer, this 28-year-old man is supposed to be getting married to his 25-year-old fiancée.
They’ve spent five years together so far, and for the majority of their relationship, they have been madly in love and happy to be spending time with one another.
He always felt that they made an excellent team, especially since they share the same opinions surrounding money, kids, and general beliefs.
“She is an incredible homemaker and works a job she is passionate about while I take care of other chores and bring home more than we need. It works out really well,” he explained.
But over the last several months, they have encountered some setbacks, and he’s struggling to feel like his fiancée is truly his partner.
Right now, it simply feels like she’s his roommate, and nothing is helping to change things. This is why he’s thinking of ending his engagement and walking away, even though they just bought a home together, which certainly complicates breaking up.
The first thing on his checklist of concerns that makes him doubt his fiancée is the one for him is that they don’t share any hobbies.
While he loves board games, concerts, music, gaming, and the great outdoors, his fiancée prefers to stay at home and cook, watch TV, or shop.
“Her interests are things that we do together often, but she is not interested in partaking in my hobbies,” he said.
Nebojsa – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
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“In some ways, I feel like I’m better friends with her dad (who shares similar interests) than her, and when he dies, I won’t have that person.”
“I am afraid that I will build long-term resentment towards her…I’m definitely frustrated by it because I really want to spend time with her doing things I love together.”
The second issue with their relationship is that their physical contact is pretty much nonexistent. His fiancée also has sensory issues.
They have had conversations in the past about this topic and how important it is to him, but nothing ends up changing, and that’s what worries him the most about moving ahead with marrying her.
Tying into the romance issues, his fiancée won’t send him steamy photos or flirty messages, even though he has asked. She actually used to do this when they first started dating, but it died out over time.
He loves buying his fiancée athleisure outfits, which he thinks are hot, or brand new lingerie, but she refuses to wear it.
“I tell her not to change out of her work clothes (because I like them) so I can take her out of them, but she just goes and puts on a big sweatshirt,” he added.
Getting to the last thing on his list, they argue constantly. His fiancée comes home from work and instantly starts relaxing, which is fine, but if he fails to complete a chore for the day, it sparks an enormous fight.
For example, she will pick a fight with him over not emptying the dishwasher during the day, even though he works from home and is actually working, so he doesn’t have time.
Then his fiancée will say she will do it, but that means she has to make dinner after that, and it will be ready later. She will spend the rest of the evening in an awful mood, and so will he because she ruined it.
“I’m not a saint, I know that, but I really hate getting nitpicked, especially after I offer to fix the issue,” he continued.
“She is very sensitive and will cry when things don’t go how she plans them (she openly admits this) e.g. today, we got into a fight because I decided we didn’t need a fan in one of the bedrooms and she was mad that I called to ask her if it was okay for us to not buy the fan which resulted in her saying that we had agreed to buy the fan and that I was inconsiderate for trying to change the plan.”
“I love her, I do, but I’m so afraid the grass is actually greener on the other side, and honestly, I have recently realized that I haven’t been happy in our relationship in months.”
Lately, he was talking to a girl who plays on the same sports team he does, and she happens to be interested in all of his hobbies.
That made the lightbulb go off for him that there are girls out there who enjoy his interests. He’s wondering if he does end things if he can find a great girl for him or if he’s doomed to find someone else with other bad traits that will end up being equal to where he is right now with his fiancée.
But, looking around at all of his friends, they’re all married to people they are genuinely happy to be with.
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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