If You Fell For A Friend, And They Don’t Feel The Same Way, Here’s How To Accept It
There are few things more humiliating than dealing with a crush who doesn’t feel the same way about you. This is especially true if you’ve had a crush on someone that you see on a regular or semi-regular basis, like a friend.
When you start falling for someone you don’t see that often, like someone you were introduced to randomly or someone you met online, and it doesn’t work out, it’s not as bad.
After all, because you don’t see that person all the time, you can go for years or even forever without seeing them again, making it easier to get over them.
But when you have a crush on a friend, a mutual friend, or someone who happens to be in your social circle, things can get awkward when they don’t reciprocate the same feelings.
When your crush doesn’t feel the same way about you but wants to stay in each other’s lives, it’s time to accept that you’ll do better as just friends.
It’s a hard pill to swallow, but once you accept that you and your crush will only be friends, life will get a bit easier. Here’s how to do it.
Stop mourning what you never had
I will be the first to admit that I can get carried away when I have a crush. I picture myself having a beautiful future with them, and then when it doesn’t work out, I feel like I’m mourning a relationship I never even had. If you’re feeling the same way, I say this with love, but snap out of it!
Before you spiral too quickly into a sad, lonely funk, remember that you didn’t have a romantic relationship with this person to begin with. Remember that the romance was likely in your head, and while you’re not a fool for having feelings, you’re a bit of a fool for letting someone hurt you so badly when you weren’t even in a romantic relationship with them.
nuzza11 – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
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Don’t beat yourself up
One of the first things you may do when you find out your crush doesn’t like you back is blame yourself. However, there is nothing you should be blaming yourself for.
Just because someone doesn’t want you back doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong; it simply means you and that person are not the right fit.
Focus on their good friend qualities
When trying to stay ‘just friends’ with a crush, it can be hard not to focus on all the things about them that made you have a crush on them. However, if you want to remain friends, remember why you like being in their presence in the first place.
Reframe your thinking and focus more on their friend qualities versus their potential partner qualities. That way, you can start to appreciate them more as a friend instead of a love interest.
Remember, there are other fish in the sea
I know you’re probably tired of being told there is someone else out there when things don’t work out with someone you want, but it’s a good thing to keep in mind.
Just because one person doesn’t like you does not mean that there aren’t many others who find you to be a total catch. You’ll have an easier time moving on once you broaden your horizons and put yourself out there for someone else.
Again, I know it’s hard to find out that someone you really like doesn’t like you back, especially if it’s someone you don’t want to lose entirely. Hang in there, and remember that you will be able to find love elsewhere!
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